A Walk to Remember!!

The path of life , show all the seasons

Sometimes its nice sometimes demand reasons

Its filled with surprises , never expected

Some frozen thoughts , some people attracted

It makes me think not once but twice

Is every decision great and wise?

And sometimes i say just let it break

together it all will make a trek

I am walking in the path , i never thought of walking

I am living a life , which was not even a dream before

People who were important previously ,are not even mere shadows

But who didnt exist yesterday , are inseperable now

When I look back , every experience seems worth

As it has mould me into , a person i am now

The walk of life is bright and hopeful

With all love and Aspirations , to a better tommorow :)

By: Ujjawal

19/04/2012

You are the devil , i am an angel

You have an illusion , of having no pretentions , no apprehensions

But remember the Devil , There is always an end to assumptions

My pen is writing the bitter truth of your lie

and now it will not stop until i die

You are the reason for my traumatic condition

An end to your answers , and end to my question!!

You Created a Mirage all around my world

But I grew up and broke it , Ohhh Devil 

I pity on you and your fakeness is broken

The girl is grown up and not playing with the love token

I was trapped in the Unknown web of spider

I was paralysed and no long a rider

Dont you dare read this and say I am a Pessimist

I have known it all , and i am not a Saddist

Your Memories will fade like colour in sun 

And Someone will bring again some more fun

I say it , to hurt you , to get you to the pain

So that your devilness shall wash away in rain

I assumed you to be my dream , my wish , my lover

Though you were in reality the Silent Killer

Hey Devil ,I will ,Yes I will Break your Vicious Circle

Just to make you see me dancing with some one else IN PURPLE.

You are the One!!!

The reason of my death

the destructor of my fate

I thought you are my pride

left with nothing by my side

Lately I made a wrong choice

and today i have a sad voice

the stains of my blood will remain

and will let you cry in vain

you made me cry , u made me sad

I wish i was happy with what i always had

I cant decide i cant defend

Now I am so weak , I cant even Pretend

I will live , i will fight and will stand again

But you , will have to pay for this disdain!!!

@Ujjawal 

Destruction @its peak !

The Loose Love

Writing on 5th January 2012 , at 5:00 am 
It is unbelievable and unimaginable to think that this date brought a lot to my life , alot of realization and a lot of pain too . Going back to 5th January 2010 , when i met the best person in my life who is today the worst person i have ever known. I never want to disclose you , what you have done , or what you will do to disturb my life , but yes today finally i can say that : I was wrong at my Choice.
I had never thought that my choice would be so wrong that i will have to cry for it , but yes I am and I will be regretting it forever . I don't know why i wasted 2 beautiful years of my life in efforts to know you , love you or to be with you .
Damn !!!!!!!!!!
It is so that today i can say that i loved a person who was not worth it and yea i hate myself for it , but also thanks to god , I have good enough people in my life who can value me and help me in standing back in the time when i am devastated.
Damn Guy !! I thought of destroying myself because of you , but today after talking to you hopefully for the last time , i realised my value , I know its too too late , but its okay , i will try to cover up for the pain i gave to myself.
Nothing more to it , and i wish to forget u forever by the next 5th january 
A SAD DAY

@Destruction :(
@Ujjawal ( Rarely in a pathetic mood) @ 5 am 5jan 2012 ( i will remember this always)

Writing her own Script .........unending !

I find myself in a very special position that I am sure many of you would be envious of. Do you ever imagine having the super power of invisibility so you could eavesdrop on conversations others have about you?

Every morning, I look up at the sky, wondering if I’ll catch a glimpse of kindness there, but I don’t. The indifference of the still water in the pond, and the bareness of the sky need not reflect the indifference of people. I don’t want to look up to any unkind sky or any unfriendly person, searching for it to vouch for my readiness, my attitude and my honesty.  But every time I say this to myself, also I need to reassure about the self-confidence I have in my opinions and the unbiasness in them. I think and rethink about my perseverance of things before penning them down on a sheet of paper , because these are my thoughts which are engraved in me and I don’t want anyone to change himself/herself based on my views.

Someone said “Being Grateful is at the core of being educated”.

But what I see everywhere, is sore and ungrateful odd people, who have been grossly overeducated. I am trying to find whether this is my perception towards the world, or probably towards many of the people or is it that the World is changing.

I have been doing things that I like and I really don’t focus much about what other think about it but still that sometimes I don’t understand why so many people have to talk about so many others, when they are not yet self -aware.  How can someone be so very interested in someone else? This is my world and nobody has got a right to modify and manipulate it their way.

I am happy that all my writings come from my own experience, and hence if I have a strong opinion based on that, which you cannot certainly change it, because you know where it is coming from.

So, when looking at the future what do you see?  I would see a graceful educated women, sensible, caring and above all Grateful :) :)

The Venom Kiss

While I was watching “Rockstar” , suddenly a statement spoken by ranbir , tickled my mind for two minutes , rather more .:) , and guess wot was the statement :P “Chalo Kiss karte hai” and immediately I was head stuck , because it reminded me of you .

Yea , the day, I met you at the terrace of my house , and you asked me how much I weigh. Although In my mind you were super decent guy , and till that moment super unromantic also . But that day , you gave a little hint , that you are also sensitive, uhmm J ,well and then the romantic story started with passion and zeal for , :P :P KISSES.

It was a crazy experience to look for you , gaze you , rip you , with looks that were obsessed and wild for being with you .Wanting you like anything , and not letting you go for hours , was the ultimate goal of that time .Snatching and hiding you from the whole world was like a winning trophy. Riding the bike, having you at the back seat, and enjoying by your side in your sophisticated car drives, that time was certainly different. We didn't even left the coaching stairs, at 9 o clock, not morning, 9 PM ;) , just checking if the guard is not there. And saying: chalo kiss kartei hai ;)

Cannot say that those were the best days of my life, as life is still going on, but yes the craziest days for sure, lived life to its fullest with you, enjoyed, loved, killed and lived. Those days were so crazy that they actually made me crazy (its not rhythmic and difficult to comprehend also). Spent most of the time in making the best of you and worst of me . And what after that ….huhh ……:P that is not the prime topic now ;) 

That was the Venom Kiss .................destructive thoughts @their best :)

The Tale of Two cities

City .............................................................................................................and the other city 
They both are good ,they both are settled , successful and all other magnificant words are poured at them by many people now and then.then Y D SELF SEARCH IS STILL ON???????????


November 26/11/09
While we were driving back from the bridge , in the cold chilly night of November ,engrossed in our dreamy world ,he told me about the confusion he is living with regarding his dilemma for the decisions and priorities in life.
Madly in love with him , I gave a whole analysis and observation of what he should do .
The only couple in the town living with the promise of "No pretentions and no apprehensions" , was very happy in their life . With in numerous thoughts and dreams pertaining to our near future , slowly we started to dissolve the in dependency and became complementary of each other.
We were young , dynamic and innovative , both used to enjoy being with each other and people envy at our happiness.The time moved and slowly the day came when I had to control all the tears , pain and the fear of losing him in  heart , and wished him a very happy Journey and a bright future. 
Soon he realised that he is very lonely and sad without me and asked me to come and meet him  in the new city anyhow . After making all the manipulations and getting a hold of the situation , I reached the desired destination and after meeting him , I was very sure that they are made to be kept intact forever.
But, the happiness didnt lasted long and I had to come back  home , because of  studies , which led to another phase of loneliness.
It is always said that "Good things are rare" and the same happened with both of us , trying every if and but to try to be nice , slowly things went bad and we started losing the threads on our life ....................

Today , things have changed completely , With many reasons , unsaid , unclarified and undone ..........Me and him don't even recognise each other..........there is a distance in the time and the heart.The two cities made our life miserable. 
Every  night I see the moon , i ask why..............................i wasted a lot of time and  the self search startes all over again.


Ujjawal 31/10/11